this is wad i tink everytime wen i am feeling down..n tat is tml will be a better day n all this is de test of lifes..but all this really show how stupid i am..as de day pass by wad i get is sad n sad n sad...a total defeat to my ownself..i can tell ppl about all this yet i can't do it myself...wad i always tink is all wrong..n 1 thing i think is tat i must live my lifes till wad i do i must not regret n must face it...but nw i am trying to run away frm it n regreting it alot nw...do i have a choice in choosing a true one...even if i have a choice dat choice is rejecting....wad is wrong with all this..a person who can counsel others yet can't solve de probs himself...a total failure..even my favourite hobby i have totally lose interest in it...today went to get back my feelings for bball n i feel tat its a total no more of it..its just tat i am starting to hate wad ever i lyk to do last time..no one can tell me wad to do or so..cos they wun noe wad is this lyk...different ppl have different kind of probs n not all will be de same...so its really difficult to find someone who can help me with it..not even she who trusted in...GOD...a person who is further n further frm me n closer n closer to GOD...i can't really say how i feel here...it will be something stupid for me to say but i rather keep it to myself..cos if i write down there will be trouble again...y must we believe in wad others believe can't we think on our own..must we believe wad de books say n de bible says...its all something which other ppl write out..can't we believe our own...living urs lifes believing in wad others believe is such a fool..just lyk living for others lyk tat...tml bio test n yet no xin qing to study...but no matter wad i can't fail it..cos i am already a failure..it i fail somemore i tink i will have no mood to study le...no one have seen de real angry n saddistic of me yet..which i dun think no one will wanna c as u can't really noe wad it is lyk..ppl r saying tat i am nice n so..but u all dunno me well...its just one small side of me..maybe i have seen too little things n too inmature..i agree tat i dunno u very well..but at least more den alot more ppl...i am not always with u so i cannot be understanding u very well..but i am trying..to understand u more so tat u can believe in me..showing out urs love is actually a very difficult thing...cause if u say out de thing might turn out differently..lyk if de person lyk u n keep on say de person might be not believing it..but if u dun say it out de person will dunno urs feelings about u...n will regret if nv say..so say or dun say oso got de bad side of it..wen shi jian qing wei he wu...zi jiao ren shen si xiang sui.....
_>_>_Zhi Yang>_>_> gave his heart at5/09/2006 09:10:00 PM
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